No Need to Validate — http://thegodjourney.com/wordpress/2008/09/12/no-need-to-validate/

I remember when we first started this whole podcast thing, we just came up with the name God Journey. Some people didn't like it. I think it's perfect. This is not about me. This is not my journey. I am a supporting actor in a greater drama that's going on. This is about him. Thinking outside the box isn't about whether you go to a meeting or not. It's about breaking free of the obligations of religious performance and living in the adventure of a relationship with God as our Father. Two real guys talking about life, that's a good tagline. Slinging freedom all over the place and making no apologies, this is the God Journey. Well, I'm Wayne Jacobson and I am still Brad Cummings and we're back for another edition of the God Journey. Again, we're there. Yeah. The God Journey. If you ever just not put in the, you go to the Temple of Freedom. Yeah. I've had people go to the Temple of Freedom. I've wondered what that was. It's not been a good experience. No? No. Make sure you get the the there. Like a cosmic freedom thing. Hey, I've got Wisconsin reinforcements this week. What do you mean? I got a letter from Bill. Yeah. Bill has some pushback. He said, regarding Brad and his mosquito phobia. Hey, I live there. Just you can push back all you want, but I'm a resident. He is currently a resident. Okay. They got rid of them. He says, we have your back on this one, Wayne. There were not any mosquitoes when you were here. I did see one. So I don't know what. Show me the postmark. They got a two week period in June when they get bad. But then they go away for most of the rest of the summer once the dragon flies and bats fill up on them. I didn't see those either. You know where they go? They go to Madison, Wisconsin where they're hanging out all summer. Well, this may make his other point. Here's what he says about Madison. Wasn't Brad from Madison? Yes. And caught the college drinking capital of the world. Yes. There are the 44 ounce are at the at the college student union. That's the smallest one you can get. So he says a lot of Madison folks have hallucinations regarding mosquitoes due to the condition they are in. True. I did walk around this, you know, all college smoke out on the campus where everyone's smoking pot all around the state capital. I thought that was a little overt. But he's saying that he's he's saying mosquitoes down there have a result of hallucinations, which you're seeming to underscore. So maybe maybe so. I think I think the mosquitoes are attracted by the smell of pot. Could be. Maybe. Because maybe that would explain their rather pervasive down there. Maybe they think it's the bats and the dragonflies and it's not as the returning students to Madison. There you go. There you go. And he says and the sweet corn. What's with the sweet corn? He said it's best from late July to mid August. Right. You were there. No late August. He said after that it does taste like dirt and is better fed to hogs than humans. Again, regarding Brad, depending on what condition you are in, dirt might taste good. Bill's got a lot for you. All right. Well, God bless you, Bill. I was the resident. I did my tour of duty. I have been freed from my land of exile. And he did think our new potential book title eat me or go home was hilarious. I have gotten a number of you who's on that. They love that. He said enjoying the sewing reaping podcast. He actually likes your Brad and how at times people base it on their circumstances. I find that people do the same thing when it comes to scripture. They use scripture to justify the position that they are in their circumstances. Then they do move on in the revelation that God is imparting to them. Wouldn't it be bizarre if you had friendships and you based the value of your friendship upon something external and material that related to that friendship. The friendship wasn't good unless you were getting all this stuff. People do. Wouldn't that bizarre? People do. People do. I guess they don't do it with me. The statistics out there are people who win significant amounts of money in a lottery within five years wish they hadn't because they lose all their friends. Because their friends expect to share the wealth. Stuff. And when they don't. My dad had one of those moving next door to them. Bought the cabin next door where my folks live. And just said they lost all their friends when they won the lottery. Because people wanted stuff. Not the friendship. Wouldn't that be an absolute bizarre thing? I suppose people do it. If this is about relationship and it's about an intimacy found with an actual person called the living God that we can know and we can relate to. If the way you want to assess it is based upon material stuff. That's how you know you got a good friendship or not. That's pretty sick. Absolutely sick. But we do it. If you're my friend, you will give me everything you have. Thank you. I mean it really strangely is that we do value the goods over the relationship. Do you think people do that on a horizontal plane? Do you think they actually do that with? I mean. In significant issues. That's what the prodigal son's doing to dad. I want you things not you. I do think it happens. It's tragic. But I don't think that's how your average person assesses his present tense friendships. Not your average functional person. I agree with that. And I think it's like, well, if that's a healthy lens, like the friendships that I value, I don't value them because of stuff they give me. I value them because the context of genuine relationship. The Cummings household, my three children right now, they've all come back from school. Schools begun again. And they've all come back in different moments and tears because of loneliness issues. People that they've thought were friends. All of a sudden they don't have that relational intimacy or something's not working on recess. And you're just going like, it's been a bummer because I mean, my heart breaks from my kids. You're just going like, yeah, but you know what? You can't control that stuff. My admonition has been all you can do is prove yourself friendly. Go find some other ones. If these guys aren't hanging and there isn't a sense of the enjoyment of your presence, well then go find someone with whom it is. But I look at that and it's like, okay, it's not about stuff for them. It's about relationship. And I think that those things are not foreign concepts for us. If my three children understand relationships and the need for them and it isn't stuff related, I don't think this whole dynamic with God is so bizarre. Either you know you have a sense of relationship or you're going to have that sadness like something's wrong on the recess play yard. I think that's why love is so shallow on a human plane. Love for most people means what I get from you. As long as I get something from you, we're friends. And when I don't get something from you, you don't do what I want, you're not there with the way I want you to be, then we discard it. I was teaching at a Vineyard Men's Retreat this weekend up in Central California. And I asked at one point, just in the course of something I was showing, how many of you have ever been betrayed by a close friend? And there wasn't a person in the room that couldn't say, yeah, we have been. I think that's just one of those universal human realities. We all know betrayal pretty well, and so did the king. In Jesus' view, love isn't based on what you give me or do for me, it's based on my laying down my life for you. Every good relationship I've had, the dynamic in it that makes it work is not I'm getting something from them and I'm giving them back a commensurate amount, but it's just someone you care enough about to give your life to. Not all those become good friendships, but the good friendships I have come from that relating. Yeah, and I think that, you know, I look at the, there's a long list of people I have chosen to invest in, and I don't think I did it from an investor standpoint. Like, well, I wonder what my return is out of this. I think I just decided, you know what, I've got something to give and I'm going to invest it and where it's received, we're probably going to enjoy a relationship that comes out of it. And you know what, I've gotten a rich reward out of those relationships. Yeah, and even if you don't get anything back, the fact that you've given of your life to someone else is still a wonderful thing. I think relationships come out of people who become mutual in that life. But there's a lot of people you get to love that you may not get a friendship with, you may not get life with. Again, am I looking for my return? But I did reap the joy of investing. I think the last podcast about sewing and reaping, I think that is profoundly true, though not often perceived, in the whole dynamics of relationship. That's what we're trying to explain to Taylor. She's seven years old, she's in tears on the stairs, and just going like, you know, honey, the reality is if you'll simply show yourself friendly, you just invest kindness all over the playground. Trust me, you will reap a huge reward of a lot of people who will enjoy being your friend. And, you know, just a little pat on the head and a little hug, and she runs off, and that's fine. Kiss the alley and we're back at it again. Yeah, there we go. This is from John, John's been our brother struggling to get out of that pretty corrupting TP police fellowship he was a part of. You remember the story he got a few podcasts ago, we can't keep trailing it. He's even read a book called Slave and the Citizen, The Life of Frederick Douglass. And he thought since he'd been a slave it would be a good read, which is interesting. He said, I got to page two and had to put the book down. The author tells how in Frederick's life there was a defining moment when he knew he would be free. I said, I knew when that moment was for me. At the moment I accepted the thought to look into the shepherding movement. I felt as if something left me. I feared for days that God had left me. Now I see it was the control of the false religious system that was losing its hold on me. I still had to walk it out and make the steps to leave, but it was easier after that day. The illumination that you will be free. What a great thing. Even if you don't know it yet. He said the book talks about the fact that Frederick asked a lady to teach him to read. This is when he was a slave. He learned several things very quickly as a young boy. Then this lady showed her husband, who was the master, and he was enraged and she got in trouble. His lessons were cut off after that. The master said, you can't teach a slave to read or write, or they'll get ideas and run away. He said, the thought hit me like a brick. That is why control freaks want to control the flow of information. In the previous group, I was a part of them. Keep them from reading and seeing what may cast doubt on our power and right to control them, or they might leave. Wow. You just think of the institutions and structures and how so much of that is, yeah, I want to somehow hurt and control the dissemination of information. There are certain things that this group can know and certain things that that group can't, because that's going to run amuck. Or certain things you can read, or don't read the shack, because it'll give you a disturbing point. The whole bend is not, hey, it's a lousy book. Don't read it. You can't read it. It will ruin you. That's master talk. That really is. I've got to control the environment, because if you give people a taste of freedom, they'll run away. That's great. In an episode, I mean, when you look at how Jesus walks through the Gospels, do you see a lot of control dynamics? You see none. You see the disciples getting a little uppity at times like, hey, wait a minute, those guys are doing miracles and they're not really part of this, so you better stop them. It's like, I don't think we're going to. Don't need to. That's bizarre. The Pharisees always threatened, always trying to keep the crowd away. You're not authorized to do this. Yeah, you don't have the right authority structure to be doing what you're doing. I mean, all those things are from people who don't believe the truth is profound enough that you've got to limit the table of ideas because truth will not stand up for itself. And that's the fear that controls people who want to control people. And then it does. I got to say, this side of that fence, that looks funny. It does look funny. I remember when, you know, I think when I was a younger man in leadership, I think there was that sense that I need to somehow protect my place here or I'll lose my sense of authority. And it's like, this side of that fence, it looks pretty stupid. Either you have it or you don't. If you lose your grip on truth because you read something that is not true, you didn't have a grip on truth to begin with. You really didn't. All you had was you had a limited number of alternatives to consider. This I got from Kent from St. Louis. I love it. This was part of another discussion we were having about something else. He said, one of the most profound things religion had taught me that actually turned out to be true was this. Never question. Never question religion because that was a dangerous practice and might lead to it falling falling apart in the questioning. And he goes, they were right. Once I began to question it, honestly, it all fell apart. Gosh, I love that. I suppose if you want to keep it together, you really probably ought to just cling to the glue. I guess. Man, I think that's just a profound thing. And Robin writes, this love all your podcasts, but the last one's particularly thought-provoking for me. As you were talking about, if we think at all that we can do it by ourselves, that's humanism. That was the thing we were doing a little takeoff on the Olympics thing that I was immediately taken to my carous maniac pass. I was a little biased there. Where there was such a drive to change the world and to have huge and dramatic effects in the people around us. As recovering Taipei-driven director, leader, general pioneer, et cetera, et cetera, none of which ever had any huge or lasting effect on my community because I was never allowed to go out there because I still wasn't mature enough or developed enough or whole enough. I find myself in a very unfamiliar place of having very little vision, few dreams, and no drive except to get healed up from a past year of trauma and pain. Is it okay to want to enjoy life, enjoy the people around you, help people one smile at a time? Is it okay to not have any grand vision or purpose, or does that make you a lukewarm Christian? What about people who just want to live in a small town, have great relationships, and once in a while if someone comes across their path, help them along the way? Are they any less than the great evangelists in the United States, keep on slinging freedom so many of us are still trying to get rid of the shackles of disempowerment from religious condemnation? I think one of the refreshing things that came, it's a line out of the shack if anything matters, then everything matters. You know what's liberating about that? I think at times the way we value the world and the world value system is the fact that if it's big, if it has those results, like wow, it's amazing. And it's like, I'm pretty sure that's deeply entrenched. I mean, I look at people's response to the shack as a book, it's like well, it's amazing because of the stats. It's like, I think it was amazing without the stats. Yes, we were having fun before anybody else knew about it. It's like, I don't think it's now valuable because of that. And I think that the biggest challenge is you look at Jesus and I think the way He walked around in the midst of the story of the Gospels He made time for the individual. He was able to stop amidst the big crowds of this and that and He never got lost with the fact that every person in front of Him was of infinite value. Yeah, it was a significant moment. You don't get the sense at all that He had an unfolding purpose to get to today. His purpose was to take life as it came to Him and reinterpret it in the reality of who God is for people. And that's why He's the woman at a well or hanging out with Zacchaeus having lunch. It wasn't this grand plan I'm moving on to today and you're kind of in the way and people aren't interruption and Jesus, I think that's one of the things that's really changing. My whole care is maniac past to if I use the same term and being a type A leader, director, pioneer type of trying to get all this stuff done and affect the community at a large level. I think you're right. I think you affect the community more by living with what's in front of you every day and seeing what that the consequences of that leads to rather than boy, I've got this purpose and I've got to get this purpose done and I've got to get these five-step plans and get these people online raise money do it. None of that stuff ever has the impact that loving people one at a time and our lives unfold and even Paul talked about to the Thessalonians about living quiet and responsive lives. You don't have to have a grand purpose. It's the power of genuineness. If someone thinks that you're doing something just to be seen I think most everyone can kind of see through that pretty quick and accept the person doing it. Yeah, probably. Yeah, but you're right. But when something's done that's genuine whether it's on a stage or whether it's behind the curtain or whether it's simply in the backwoods of no one to be seen, when it's genuine it has the power. It really does. I mean, it's impacted when you really are caring about someone and it's not so as to get onto something. Right. That does. That has an intrinsic power that's felt and oftentimes received. Yeah, and I think it really disrupts everything. If the purpose of the conversation with the woman at the well is Jesus sitting there thinking, boy this will make a great chapter in the Bible later. You've really You would have ruined the moment. I mean just even the thought of it saying there's some other agenda overlay to make this more meaningful than the fact that here's a lost thirsty woman that I can take care and interest in just for herself not for some part of revival in some area or whatever. None of those other things being there. I think what makes it powerful it doesn't mean it won't have greater impact but if you think it does I think you're going to screw it up. I'm just thinking of the disciples if they were hanging around Jesus and they were self aware like do you realize this is going to be in the Bible, dude? I mean when they're doing stuff we're going to get that down. We could use this later. Yeah, I mean wouldn't that have been absolutely bizarre and it's like I do. I was a part of different groups that we were doing large big things to try to be important and I think where I started to get the yuck factor when there was somehow a self aware like we are now the fulfillment of these prophecies or they're trying to present it as such and I just said they're going like whether it's true or not I'm pretty sure we're not supposed to be saying that or even thinking it. Yeah you're just saying something's wrong here. Something's really wrong here that we're even stopping what we're doing to imagine ourselves as the fulfillment of anything and you're just going like I'm pretty sure we're off base here. Yeah, you think. I was alone opinion at the time going like wow you know talk about you know what I am I am the rain for the parade I am the cry and you're just going like I just don't get that and so it's like you know I think whenever you've lost sight of the fact that you know what I am who I am whether anyone's watching if you're thinking about is someone watching I think your focus is off I do and I think you'll say well I'm missing things in my of course you're missing things because you're trying to fold everything into a larger agenda instead of taking life as it comes letting God breathe into your moments and let those happen however they happen and fulfill but people are worth taking interest in not because it'll make a good sermon illustration later or I can use this for a chapter of my books that's that's what's kind of nuts. It is interesting when I was a college student I had a really wonderful class that was unlike anything else it was a as a film television thing and it was taught by you know an Emmy award-winning producer and then one of the top agents in all of LA and what was really cool is they were sort of turning everything we thought on its ear and they sat down they listened to me and they gave me an assignment they said I want you to go I want you to go talk to this guy it was his name was father Kaiser he was a producer of an Emmy awards and he and he sat down and I'm sitting there like oh there's a great connection to have it and it's like the guy spent the first half hour of the time I was in his office and he said hey Brad I just I really want to communicate one thing to you we're called to be obedient not successful and you screw that up you get that backwards and neither is going to happen and the guy had you know a bunch of Emmys on the back of his little shelf and he spent this whole time not talking to me about film not talking but just talking about the purity of what are you doing this for and I got a couple of you know Hollywood guys that are seeing the altruism that's the word they use they didn't know what to call me but they always got altruism it's like whatever it was they saw a sincerity of the only reason I really want to do this is because there is a desire to communicate and the only person that they could figure to send me to was father Kaiser and honestly those were profound little lessons of just going like you know what I think all gods really asked me to do in this quote big destiny whatever just be obedient to the things that are in front of me yeah and love the folks to come by you and it will unfold now the disciples see they argue the opposite part of this because they are saying you know what guy who wants to be a famous teacher hangs around in Galilee you should be we should be in Jerusalem dude we got to get front and center we got to go Jerusalem we got to hire a publicist we got to do things to make success happen and I hear that you know a lot of the email we get now with windblown media and all that are people who feel like there is something to say and they just need a bigger platform someone needs to give them a bigger platform and part of me just wants to say dude this happens not because you want a bigger platform and you are trying to drive the strategy to get you there this stuff happens by you just loving and doing every day what God puts before you genuinely embracing it and loving it not I am going to do what I am going to do today because then God will reward me later with something big when you generally love what God is doing and the people around you on any given day that can take you anywhere but it is best to do it when you are not thinking about taking you somewhere you know I got a call earlier about an opportunity to kind of take the success of what has happened and it is like well do you guys have anything you want to say to quote the industry and I am sitting here going like the reality is absolutely did I go looking you know but when you think of it to me it is like the power of genuineness if anybody knows anything about what has happened I can tell you it is not because of the brilliance of something we did it is because of the reality of something that is this story this amazing God who is is touching lives period there is no other great explanation for the fact that you know what if this was a really great story but wasn't backed up by a really great God who is really involved in touching lives I don't think you would have anything and if at the end of the day 10 years from now if our success whatever is that those guys were the publishers of the shack oh gosh if this book there is a lot of fight going on about the book people write me about defending it in various ways and my whole deal was if this book doesn't turn people on to loving the God of the universe then it's just a book to fight over and it isn't worth doing and who cares at the end of the day the closing parts wouldn't it be really cool if the very thing that was actually tucked in there what would Mack like to see that quiet revolution of reality just lives touching other lives because they're genuinely loving people yep I think that's where this thing's all at and I really don't think you can do that until you've been loved I really think part of what we talked earlier about the whole love thing and trying to get what you need as long as God's not enough for you you will use people to get what you think you need to survive or you'll try to perform for that love yeah absolutely same thing you're still gonna try and get it from them however you have to do it instead of man when he is all I need really yeah when he's got my back then I can live in the world in a different way that allows real relationships to happen and allows real collaborations to happen and allows God to do whatever it is that God wants to do through my life you opened with that little story of that slave guy in that moment that he knew he was free he knew he wanted to be free he wasn't free yet I think that moment when the love of God penetrates past all my religious junk my trying to get it trying to be worthy when somehow that presses through all of that veil and actually touches my soul I think that's that moment where all of a sudden you're like guess what I for the first time no I'm self aware I am free I don't have to do something there's no real when that really touches your heart for me I actually entered into that strive to enter into the rest of God then never made any sense to me ever I just said like what a total oxymoron I don't get it, strive to enter rest I'm just confused right there but when all of a sudden when all of a sudden that love penetrates and I recognize you know what I am I am loved and I don't have to do anything I realize I didn't do anything to have this encounter it just all of a sudden it's like the light was there and I was freed from the trying that was a glorious moment and I just sat there going like you know what okay this does truly change everything I always hated people you know you know when you know that you know you just go like whatever that just sounded like a triple repeat of what I don't understand and it always irritated me you know that you know that you know and it's like there just wasn't a context of well I have no idea what they're talking about so what I know is that I don't know and it's like that can send you off in an insecurity of well I've got to do something and it's like you know what there is that dynamic of to strive to enter the rest I recognize that's a striving to sort of say no to all these voices of disquiet trying to get you to do something so that the one voice that really matters can actually be heard which is saying a simple I love you when that's heard in your soul it does change everything and that's where freedom seeps in even if nothing circumstantially has changed yet absolutely even the story of the little slave guy he was free the moment he realized he would be free now he's not believing the lies that keeps him trapped well you'd love this from David from Alabama this is the other side of the story it's the beginning of the story he said I finished reading the shack wondered myself two things is God really this wonderful and can I really know him like this deep and personal this was not the first time I asked questions like this I'm a pastor have been for 15 years I was raised in hellfire and brimstone and a set of rules thicker than the scriptures isn't that interesting they always are they gotta be you can't distill it down gotta make it more I feel like a trapped rat in a cage I cannot quit the church because of financial reasons and I feel like a fake every time I stand in the coffin to give a sermon in the coffin I'm just reading it I feel like I can't tell my heart about Jesus or expose my hurt or disappointment when I have tried it causes problems where do I go from here I'm stuck I have been listening to your podcast I know my relationship with Jesus my only hope I have no one to talk to no one to understand what I'm going through I hate what I've become locked in little or no options I can't imagine how many letters like this you get I am just confused and lonely and a little scared pray for me I pray one day I will experience the joy and grace that you both have I actually can hear God's love and grace in your podcast these podcasts are like water to a man in a desert to me wow contrary to a conclusion that that's a bad place I hear him saying that and I go everything inside me gets excited just go like yeah awesome please do not leave there hear the yes hear the yes when you're asking the question can God be this real I know him in this deep personal way you need not hear it from Brad or from me you need to hear it from the Holy Spirit in your heart that's going yes absolutely and let me dismantle don't look at what other people have to do or change and get on the whole anti-religion kick just begin to say Jesus would you show me the way forward Jesus I want to know you this reality you know it's really hard for quote capable people is the idea of being saved exactly what part do you play in that I mean I think I think the biggest challenge is you have to have a savior to be able to be saved the only part I am playing is sort of the receiving end of something that's done on my behalf and I look at that dynamic it's like I can't save myself or I would be my savior okay right if I want to experience something I need to have something outside of me that comes and does what I can't do but I know this from people who rescue drowning people in the water you got to have the drowning person in the water stop beating you to death when you get close to them you've got to teach them you've got to relax and this is maybe striving to enter that rest against all your fears and all your feeling trapped like a rat in a cage all that stuff you've got to quiet down let him scoop you up there is a there's a letting that I know we make that far more aggressive oh I earned that in someone no you don't your struggles keep you from seeing it and it may be kind of unfair to say stop struggling to a drowning man who's passing who's just panicked out of his mind and thrashing around but they even teach rescue you can't you can't save a person who's thrashing they teach them to bop them on the head take a big old ring beat them on the head then you can haul them in that is true it is because it's our resistance somebody asked me this weekend what's the major barrier to you living this life and I'll say it is my overestimation of my own capabilities that's exactly what makes this road nearly impossible and the fear anxious driven actions that we take I mean if you were to sit down you know we go back to that whatever is not of faith is sin and you're just going like ok wow talk about a leg sweep on most of our activities think of how many things that I do largely because of the fear of this I will now do that I'm not exactly sure those are the best decisions to do and it's not even just the fear of darkness or the fear somebody's going to do something like that it's the fear that God won't like me if I don't that fear that's not exactly faith that's exactly the opposite of what he's talking about whatever doesn't rise out of your trust in who he is now in truth and packaging I don't think I've ever stopped to assess my life from this vantage point I haven't done this but you look at that dynamic you just said no to every action that you knew was driven out of a fear dynamic don't apply this to there's an oncoming bus or I'm not locking my doors at night anymore so I can already tell myself don't do this but the reality is if you were to look at the multitude of things that we do that we're impulsed into I do recognize that most people's lives do seem to be anxiety driven they're not from a place of rest you think? I think that I think scripture makes that very clear those of us that were captive to fear all our lives and even religion is the exploitation of fear we say you know it's a shame management system shame and fear are kissing cousins no doubt about it and when I talk to people about living in the love of God the number one pushback I get most of the time is so then we just don't do anything and you go see and I understand where that comes from if our whole life even our life in Christ has been motivated by fear when you take people's fear away it's okay we just calculate I'm just gonna lay down my couch I'm gonna do nothing living in trust is the most active and alive you'll ever be it's not about not doing it but if you've only known fear it is time to find out what would your life look like if you stopped responding to the fear in it even if you just sat on your couch and felt guilty for a month what if you just faced it instead of satiating it what if you just stopped feeding those things and said Jesus settle into the guilt just go for it don't placate it you keep feeding that puppy it comes back for more you talk about the bankruptcy that actually leads to being filled why not just settle into the guilt why not as opposed to condemnation settle into the reality that yep you don't have any merits here that are gonna warrant salvation there's nothing here that's gonna warrant filling but guess what there's nothing there that's also gonna separate you from the love of God that's another verse out there that's why I just lay there on the couch and scream liar, liar, liar I feel guilty guilt is gonna take me nowhere yeah so don't go anywhere fear is gonna take me nowhere but religion has taught us fear God, fear missing him fear missing the last revival fear this, fear that that we're so driven by it when somebody tries to say let me unpack some of your fear you're going look at that good love and for some people they don't they genuinely don't have anything left but that would not be a bad place to come to a revelatory conclusion even if you just take two or three months and face all those fears and just say I'm not gonna live to them anymore but what do I do? I don't know if I'm gonna do anything well find out find out what you would do when you stop living to fear and started living in the reality of the fact that this father loves you and even when you're sitting on your couch terrified out of your mind and feeling guilty about things you think you should be doing that you're not doing anymore no that has not separated him and think of the joy of running out of things that you could justify yourself with I mean I know we spend a tremendous amount of time false validation you ever get corrected from somebody or you ever try to do that there's the knee-jerk response of well I'm gonna come up with something that will validate my worth and it's like I'm pretty sure it has nothing to do with what that person is trying to communicate oh that's why when we get off that whole religion dreadmail while people just go nuts is because we become addicted to that self-validation through our works yeah then what are you gonna do to validate yourself? right nothing nothing nothing you're passionate aren't you stop it but I think of that moment you know as you were opening this whole podcast and you're talking about that moment of knowing that you're free I sat there and I was going like okay I don't think I've ever really pondered that and so I was thinking where is it that I really started to taste that freedom and it really was when all of a sudden I recognized I ran out of things on my resume that I could assert that would demonstrate to the living God my worth there was a time when I was like you know I want to serve you and I'm trying to come up with alright I can't quite justify this to you know the parents in our life at the moment that I want to do this thing and they're kind of looking to be like well I'm not sure that's real responsible I'm trying to come up with things that make me worthy and validate and it's all because of this and I had this encounter with Laura I just came up empty it wasn't true well how do I validate my relationship with Sarah? I don't I'm pretty sure you can't I have a relationship with Sarah I don't have to validate it I have it I have it, don't need to validate it when I am feeling the need to validate it's because you don't have it because I don't feel like I have it when I know the God of the Universe has validated my life this morning I don't have to find anything I do or anyone I hang out with I don't I just get to live in that reality and care for people around me now this uh you say one more thing absolutely the 522 burn has become a 38 minute burn we were going today I think this would be fun we were going today, Christopher sent us three really troublesome verses to him we talk about the good God and living in grace and he gave us three troublesome verses we were going to talk about today but we just don't have any time to do it but wouldn't it be fun between now and the next podcast which gives you guys a few days because this goes up on Friday and we'll probably tape early in the week next week but if there are other verses like that I heard a bunch this weekend at the seminar I was at this troublesome verses of the Bible what do I what are those really how do they fit into grace like if we're talking about not responding out of fear well then what about work out your own salvation with fear and trembling so if you have more of those verses why don't you email them to us we'll toss out a couple of these as examples more like uh one of them is be perfect as your father in heaven is perfect the one about gouging out your eye if it offends you, goug it out and throw it away so we'll talk about some of those next time if you've got some you want to add to us and get to us before we record next time? Troublesome verses and sacred calves. Troublesome verses to living the life of grace because a lot of these came out in the deal I tried to say you know what what if this verse means this and people go oh my goodness one guy came up to me at the insert. Special Mind Ender you need to you need to write a study Bible so when we look at those verses we can look in the margin and say Wayne says and I said don't you dare I hope you look I hope you look at a blank margin and you say Holy Spirit what does this mean that's how we'll learn we'll talk about some of them next time until then bye bye